by Kate

How Soon is Too Soon to Donate Again?

January 19, 2012 in egg donor blog by Kate

I donated last year and am about to donate again, but have been offered another cycle that would put me back to back, meaning starting medications again a couple weeks after my retrieval. I saw you mention you did donations back to back, were they really back to back or are there too any risks in going back on the stimulating medications soon after a retrieval?

Well, to be honest, when you say you’ll donate and then start meds a couple weeks after that, I get nervous.  Quite nervous.  The standard for back-to-back cycles is that you should have 2 periods before you donate a next time.  I never donated so back to back that I felt like my body was being compromised, or I didn’t have time to FULLY recover.  You’re in charge still at this point, and if they are insistent on using you as a donor, you need to take your health into your own hands and make it very clear that you don’t feel comfortable doing these cycles so closely together.  And there shouldn’t be a doctor in the world who wouldn’t back you up on that.  If they push for it, I would be very, very wary.   As much as you’re helping someone, you ain’t a baby factory, and your health is required for anything to be successful.  I repeat:  If they are pushing for you to start meds two weeks after you have a retrieval, I would strongly object.  At MINIMUM, you should take a solid 4 weeks to breathe, if nothing else.  On the reg, you should be waiting 6 weeks before you even entertain going back on meds.  Good luck, and remember, you’re in control of your stress and anxiety level; don’t allow someone else to take over where these decisions are concerned.

by Kate

How Do I Hide the Injections on Vacation?

January 11, 2012 in egg donor blog by Kate

I’m currently in the middle of my first cycle and started injectable medication a few days ago. I have an overnight trip with a couple girlfriends this coming weekend which was planned way before my cycle. I haven’t told these friends that I’m donating and am hoping to be able to discretely do my injections so they don’t notice. Is that a crazy idea in your opinion? Do you have any advice or recommendations for stealth injecting?

Not a silly question at all, and I’ve definitely had to do it.  Before you go, put everything you need for a single injection into a single plastic baggy (one needle cap/syringe, 2 alcohol pads and whatever else the routine of your injection entails; 3 baggies for 3 days of injections, for example) and then sneak yourself into the bathroom and inject with all your tools you have pre-packaged.  Your meds will most likely need to go into a fridge, but most meds do, so it’s not weird; you could be on an antibiotic for anyone knows, you know?  Just dip into the bathroom or bedroom or whatever.  If you don’t mention it, or make a big deal out of it, chances are that no one else will, either.  Just plan ahead.  Make sure you’re prepared before you leave your house for all the times you’ll need to duck out so that when you do, it’s fast.  Have fun, and good luck!

by Kate

Should I Worry About OHSS?

January 11, 2012 in egg donor blog by Kate

Just wanted to commend you on this awesome blog. It’s been really helpful. I started injection of Lupron yesterday and I’ve beem going a little too research happy on the internet and it’s been stressing me out! I’ve always been aware of the risks but now that I’m actually on the meds, my head is spinning a bit. What I’m most afraid of is OHSS (Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome), and if it is even a rational fear. Is there really anything I can do to prevent and serious side effects? Is it treatable or if I get it am I screwed?

Congrats on your cycle!  Ummm, OHSS is not necessarily something to worry about unless your doctor tells you to worry about it.  I mean, yeah, it’s possible, and with every one of my cycles, I was cautioned about getting to that point, because the hormones kicked my little ovaries into high gear.  But I was never afraid of it, I was just very mindful that it was a possibility, and I needed to be careful.  Hydrate constantly.  And it will be more tedious as you get on in your cycle, because you’ll have to pee all of the time, but it’s your number one protection plan.  Rest, take it easy, lay low.  You can ask your doc about it if you’re worried, but I wouldn’t be unless the doc mentions it.  Trust that these people are all in place to make sure you and your follicles make it to the other side feeling as great as you did when you started.  I doubt you will have an issue with OHSS, but no one would ever abandon you should it happen.  You’re surrounded by safeguards and people to keep you safe.  Good luck, and don’t stress!

by Kate

How Bad Are Injections?

January 8, 2012 in egg donor blog by Kate

Do agencies/doctors allow you to take hormone pills instead of shots? Is that a possibility to avoid putting a needle in yourself? I have some hesitation about doing that exact thing… though if there is no alternative I will.

Unfortunately, injections are the only route available for hormones.  The injections almost kept me from doing it, too.  But then I figured if it were the most awful thing in the world, no one would do it;  it can’t be that bad.  On my first day of injections, my P.O. gives me a tip that changed everything:  Numb the injection site with a cold can of Coke.  Made sense, but I never would have thought of it, and it couldn’t hurt to try.  I took a bottle of beer–it’s all I had–and put it to my stomach for a complete commercial break.  Then I gave myself the injection immediately.  I didn’t feel a thing.  Not a single thing.  It was almost like I wanted to do it again because I was so in disbelief about how easy it was.  After that, I didn’t have a single hang-up about anything again.  Don’t let it deter you from the whole experience.  It’s not just a sorta-solution, it’s a game changer.  Give yourself the green light.


by Kate

I’m Not Sure if I’m “Qualified”….

January 4, 2012 in egg donor blog by Kate

I’m 19 years old. My family has a history of prostate cancer, alcoholism, and I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but no longer need to take medication for it. I’m a pale, blue-eyed, blond haired girl- 5′2″, 130 lbs, 3.9 GPA in high school, going to college next fall…ballerina, singer, and actress. Am I good enough to be an egg donor?

Unfortunately, becoming an egg donor has less to do with whether you’re good enough, and more about whether your genes are good enough.  I’m sure you’re amazing, and beautiful and intelligent, BUT, everything else you mentioned that is associated with your medical/genetic history is a very clear red-flag for prospective parents.  I touched on this when I was asked about cancer running in the family a few months back.  Read my post, and see if it helps clear anything up for you.  Good luck!

http://askaneggdonor.com/will-cancer-in-my-family-automatically-disqualify-me/

by Kate

Why is Having a Normal BMI Important?

January 4, 2012 in egg donor blog by Kate

Why do all egg donors have to be in normal BMI?  Even if you are not is there a way for you to donate?

I think it’s reasonable for donors to be within the normal BMI range.  Like any other set of conditions for an unpredictable process:  Whatever data points can be standardized, or whatever risk can be avoided or mitigated, every attempt should be made to do so.  It would be like buying a dented can at the grocery store; everything inside is probably just fine,  but why risk what you can’t see if there is a clear way you can avoid the risk?

by Kate

What Can I Expect Immediately After Retrieval?

December 28, 2011 in egg donor blog by Kate

I am in my first cycle right now and I was wondering how long the recovery was after the retrieval? Will I need to be bed ridden for the first couple of days, and do you get a period or bleeding right after the retrieval? How far after the retrieval are you able to be sexually active without a great chance of becoming pregnant and or being in discomfort?

After your retrieval, you won’t feel like doing much.  There are no hard and fast rules, but it wouldn’t matter if there were, because your body will pick your pace for you.  I would count on being out of the game for about 4 days.  And of you feel better on Day 3, great, but continue to take it easy because just like anything else, not allowing yourself adequate time to heal will just prolong the healing process in general.  This is not a return-to-life-the-next-day kind of a procedure.  You may have some bleeding, but probably not.  I never did, but I was told it’s a possibility.  Your period will show back up about 3 -4 weeks after retrieval.  And I will be very honest–and this is gonna sound weird and probably gross–you’ll have some discomfort when you have to go #2.  I dunno what it is about the way things move all up in and around your intestines, but it doesn’t feel good.  You’re not dying, nothing is wrong, but until you actually poop, you’ll be in pain while you try–by Day 2, that should pass.  It’s a part of the fact that you just had a needle stick your insides about 20 times.  That takes it toll.  And don’t be even thinking about sex for at least 10 days.  If you really don’t want kids, then hold off for 2 weeks.  There is no telling how easily you could get pregnant.  Better safe than sorry!  You should be back to normal–including losing the “baby weight”–in about 10 days.  I would start taking a slow-paced walk on the 3rd day of recovery if for no other reason than to get out and get your blood flowing, and gradually increase your physical activity so that you’re back to real-life by the second week after retrieval.  Your attention to your recovery could make or break how you view the donor process.  I’d take as much care of it as you did your injections and appointments.  Good luck!

by Kate

What Are A Donor’s Responsibilities?

December 21, 2011 in egg donor blog by Kate

I’m 19 and am on my first donation cycle.  I’m working with a satellite clinic since the donor program I’m with is based in California, but the recipients are on the east coast.  I don’t have support from them really.  The recipients are in a state close by, but their doctors don’t really look out for me much.  No one even showed me how to do injections, I had to Google videos.  Is there normally more support than this?  I have to call everyone, the pharmacy, the travel coordinator, the donor program, the satellite clinic, and the recipient’s doctors, all on my own to find out all the info.  I feel like this is a lot more responsibility than I was expecting, but perhaps I expected too much…?

This is awful.  I wish I cold help you more than just this post.  Especially since I have to be honest and say that this is NOT how I experienced egg donation.  Nor is it likely most experience the process this way.  I have nothing to even offer you except to say to continue to be all over it until it’s over, and make sure you’re all over whomever is paying you.  If it’s going along like this, I’d make darn sure the accounting department were at least on top of this, as it’s the one area you have no leverage over.  As it is now, you’re holding the eggs, everyone has to work with you, but if it’s going like this, I have no confidence they’ll be there to support you once it’s done and over.  All this said, you can’t do anything about it now.  You’re full swing.  But next time–if there is a next time–you will know the pitfalls to look out for when trying to find an agency to represent you and your eggies.

When I was a donor, I had Ellie.  I called her my PO, parole officer.  She took care of everything.  No matter what I needed or when I needed it, I called my PO.  She would take it from there.  Your agency is a liaison for all your needs with the doctors, the pharmacy, the travel arrangements, the recipient/surrogate, everything and everyone.  I had three cycles where my recipients were in NY, and I’d NEVER have known they weren’t right down the street the whole time.  None of this should be stressful for you.  Sometimes, the doctors’ office and/or the pharmacy would leave me hanging or not follow through–they have a gazillion irons in the fire and it’s expected–like any doctor anywhere.  But I would call Ellie, and the floodgates of information would swing open and I’d be right back up to speed immediately.  When you’re looking for an agency, look for one who–like a man you’d date–seems to want you, and seems to want to take care of you.  Your eggs are their investment, it behoves all parties to be particularly aware of every move you make, and correct any that aren’t going according to a plan.  Finish this out, don’t be afraid of the Industry just because of this one experience–though, if you were, I’d not blame you–and when it’s over and you’ve had a little distance, start the search over for an agency that looks like a place you’d want to represent a donor you would use.  You know?  Good luck, hang in there!

by Kate

Should I Donate to My Sister?

December 17, 2011 in egg donor blog by Kate

My sister-in-law is having trouble conceiving on her own. She has been through 2 failed IVF treatments and thinking of going again. We talked about getting a donor egg (because her FHS level is a problem), and we even talked about me giving her my eggs. I have two beautiful children and honestly I do not want any more children. However, I am having very mixed fillings about everything. Our family is very close and I know I will always be in this child’s life as their aunt and I don’t want to be their mother, but I am not sure how I will feel. Looks always play apart in having kids, matter of fact people always say my daughter looks like my sister in law, but I think how will she feel about them saying her child looks like me? Or what if something goes wrong and the child is born with a birth defect would she blame me? I talked to my husband and he is ok either way, but thinks that it is special to do this and is for it. Just want some thoughts.

To be honest, I think you’ve answered your own question.  If you’re here to run it by me so I can tell you I agree with your hesitations, then I am here to tell you that I agree with your hesitations.  I do not think entering into a donor/recipient relationship with a family member is a good idea in the least.  That is also a completely personal opinion.  I don’t know the ins and the outs of the situation, but I don’t think I need to objectively say that your niece or nephew will be your son or daughter, and at some point in both of your lives, that will need to be addressed–emotionally and literally.  I cannot tell you what to do here, but I do think it’s clear your gut is screaming pretty loudly and these are the times you listen to your gut.


by Kate

I’m 32 and I Just Need the Money.

December 17, 2011 in egg donor blog by Kate

I was interested in doing egg donation for the first time. I realize it’s not an easy process but is it doable with a full time job? I’m 32 years old in great health, don’t drink, smoke or do drugs. Honestly, just need the money. Can you recomend a reliable agency or point me in the right direction to where I can get informaiton? What is the pain level like? What is the worst part? After the day of retrieval could I go back to work and be fine?

Well, I know my agency has an age limit of 30-years-old, but it’s not the only agency in town.  I would do some research on age limits, and see which agency can accommodate your age–and I know it seems strange that 32 might be too old, but it is what it is in this industry.  I can’t recommend an agency for you, as I was only with one, but it’s a relatively easy search, and if you could find this blog, you will easily find the answers you need.  As for everything else, I don’t care why you want to donate.  Money, emotion, bucket list–makes no difference to me.  It’s a massive amount of money–in my opinion–and it’s worth every penny.  If that’s you’re objective, you’re in the right place.  I didn’t think there was a worst part.  I know how weird that sounds, but the entire experience for me was a good one, through and through.  Maybe it’s because I love to have order and control, and following a strict regimen of meds and appointments is right up my alley, but even if it weren’t I can’t imagine coming out on the other side of egg donation and having anything but good thoughts.  Based on your direct, straight-forward question–with no spelling, grammar errors or ridiculous anywhere in the verbiage–I think you’ll be just fine on this one.  I will say, though, to your last question:  Returning to work.  It won’t happen the next day.  You won’t want it to, and your body won’t be able to.  My first donation was on, like, a Friday and I said I’d be back to work on Monday and that didn’t happen.  I felt so fine, just lethargic, so I acted like I didn’t just have an invasive surgery, and I overexerted, and I was very sorry.  After that first one, I took a week off for every donation.  It’s the only tricky part, but it’s necessary.  I’m a beast of an athlete, and I have an absurd tolerance for pain, but there is no ignoring the fact that your body needs to heal whether you feel fine or not.    If you can swing the time off for recovery, then green light…go get ‘em.  But if you are planning–or are only able–to take a day, maybe two days, off work, you will not fare well.  Think about it.  I have no doubt you’re capable and in it to win it, but the time commitment is pretty substantial because of your appointments, meds schedule and recovery time, so you will need to be prepared for that, definitely.  Good luck!